The Christmas Sweater..

I'm reading this book called 'The Christmas Sweater" By Glenn Beck. And I encourage everyone to read it.. I have never read A book that teaches such a good lesson and shows that you have things in your life because you deserve them. It definatly teaches you how to not take this and others for granted. I have so far enjoyed that book and I am not one that likes alot of the books that I read.

"Sometimes the hardest part of the journey is believing you're worthy of the trip."
— Glenn Beck (The Christmas Sweater)

Most times we're so focused on what we think we want that we can't appreciate how happy we already are. It's only when we forget about our problems and help others forget theirs that we realize how good we really have it."
— Glenn Beck (The Christmas Sweater)


These are two quotes that are from the book, and are actually two things I will Look at differently.. one thing I hate about the world is that people take advantage of the simpliest thing. the Smallest things, the most important things that are in there life, and I dont think its fair. I've taken advantage of things and I know everyone else has once in there life if not more. Its one thing that you can stop doing but people just continue doing it. Not everyone does it intentionally its just something that happens. I've learned that in my life taking advantage of others and more the ones closest to me doesnt get me ANYWHERE. Becasue those are the people that help me with who I am today. They've helped me see what life truly has to offer and what I can do to accomplish my goals. Over come my fears. And pursue my dreams. And to my I think in my life is important. Taking advantage of others doesnt really get you anywhere and I know that for me its just gonna casue me to lose the ones I love! And that is something I want to risk. So why do people take advantage of others? I am not so sure... I wish it was something I knew but then again I cant answer for everyone but rather only me. And I answer for me I am not sure why I do it, but I know there is a way that I can stop it. there is a way that I can not cause me or the ones around me pain by NOT taking advantage of them.

My life is official were I want it.. This is a NEw beginging for me and I shall make the best of it. I know that I deserve that much!

The book of life..

Sometimes I wish life came with a manual. To show you and teach you something when times get hard, when your stressed it would show you how to deal. If you fight with someone it would teach you to see where the other person is coming from and show that solving problems helps. It makes things better. Also to show how someone else is hurting and how there pain may bd worst than yours. Having that guide to show you what to do and what to say when the family member that is so close to is hurting cause nothing is going right for them. Just that guide that would explain how life works. I wonder why we don't have that guide.. But then I think of the reason they say lifes an adventure, on an adventure you learn and see new things. Life as an adventure or journey is hard but we all make it through even if it's hard. We hurt people, say things we don't mean, and do many unintentional things that we just would lOve to take back, but can't.

In the game of life ivE actually learned alot these past few weeks and I am trying to be the person everyone needs me to be but more importantly who I need to be for me. It a hard thing to change but the way you change is a good thing if you know it's for the better. I've felt relived, different, honest, happy, free. More like the girl I should have been a year Ago. And ive changed and I feel it's good, but I also hope others can see and they think it's for the good too.

The feeling I get everyday when I wake up is one ive never gotten before.. One I don't know how to explain and one that I would never want to replace. I hope it stay and doesn't go for it seems to complete the marisaa I know..

The words..

Everyone has words and things they hate to hear! But then there are the ones they like. Words that inspire me and make me feel like I could be a better person is 'I'm proud of you' those for words me everything to me. When I hear them there is a rush that I feel that I wouldnt change for anything.. It's those words that make me wanna pursue my dreams and the passion that I have for something. Because I know that there is someone out there that is "proud of me" it's just an outstanding feeling..

There was something that I had heard today that was said like this "love is a decision." Listening to those words come out of someones mouth got me thinking.It's crazy how people can hear just a few words and it can change anything. Like in a realationshop the words "we need to talk" are four words anyone dreads to hear. But then there are those two words "I do" that are magical... That something so small could mean something so amazing. Simple words can change your life forever. Hearing "love is a decision" changed my life. Not knowing what love was and still after a year of loving someone trying to figure it out I today realized loving someone is a choice, it isn't doing it because everyone else is, or because it just seems right. But LOVE IS a DECISION. It is trying to figure out if you are willing. To me after yesterday thinking I knew what love is and had it all figured out I today realized I know what it is and I am truly inspired to get the opportunity to LOVE!!

The start..

They say that everything happens for a reason, that it all leads you to better things in your life. When though? When does those better things in life come around? I've watched people that are close to me struggle, I've watched them hurt and go through things I wouldn't wish on anyone. So for those people when does it get better? When do they get to live a normal life? Why are they the ones that have to be in pain and have one thing happen after another? One thing that's good in my life are the amazing people that it consist of. Every single person that is in my life and is close to me, is supported. With out the support of those people I wouldn't be the person that I am today.

I am a seventeen  year old girl who as everyone would see on the outside is living the life that she wants. About a year ago if you had asked me that question I would have answered with no, I am not living how I want to. I could change things in my life. But if you asked me now, I would say I have never been happier! I may have things not go my way and I may see the people around me hurt. But me, I AM HAPPY! I am happy with the person I am and the person I know that I want to be. I've realized that there is no reason in my life that I don't have to be happy.  I have my moments of not being happy and the moments that I feel like my world will end. I have the moments where all I want to do is cry and I don't want to talk to anyone. I have those moments and I think everyone does. But I have to look past those moments, and look towards the future and what I have to be happy for. And that is what this year is about..

Lesson 1: Let go.

"Holding on to anger is like holding on to a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned" -Buddha

" You build on failure. You use it as a stepping stone. Close the door on the past. You don't try to forget the mistakes, but you don't dwell on it. You don't let it have any of your energy, or any of your time, or any of your space. " Johnny Cash

Mom, I know you will get through this because you are an amazing woman and you'll fight all this stuff off! You're not one to let anything affect you.

Debbi, Good luck with everything. You're a strong an amazing woman and you'll get through this. You have so much support. 

I love both of you lady's! (:

and Tyler, Thank you for being there for me. I love you and you make me happy. Without you being by my side it would be hard. So thank you.